


Touchy Feely

by sammyswagstar



Series: OT4 Series [1]
Category: 5 Seconds of Summer (Band)
Genre: Demisexuality, M/M, Shower Sex, handjobs, michael gets handsy in the shower
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-03
Updated: 2017-08-03
Packaged: 2018-12-10 12:34:53
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 9,144
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11691747
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sammyswagstar/pseuds/sammyswagstar
Summary: The fic with demisexual Michael and ot4 that no one asked for. Michael gets handsy in the shower with his best friends and they take advantage of him, before they all get their happy ending. Pun intended?





	Touchy Feely

**Author's Note:**

> my tumblr is angelmikeyy if you wanna check me out yo. i wrote this for myself. i love ot4 and i love demi michael and i hope you love my fic

There were a few things Michael Clifford never shut up about if you knew him. Pokémon GO, memes, and sex. He spoke so openly about women and men that it was pretty obvious to those closest to him that he was into _at least_ those two genders. His boys knew it since they were teenagers because Michael was figuring himself out, going through rough shit, and needing some support. Support which he found easily from Luke, Calum, and Ashton because they hated to see their goofy, cheerful friend so unhappy and so reluctant to cuddle because he was starting to realize he liked the feel of a male body against his own. That was when Ashton came out, too, to support Michael even further. He had kept to himself up until then that’d he’d experimented with men and women, but it helped Michael immensely to know he wasn’t alone in this. 

The level of trust between the boys in the band broke scales. Which just made Michael feel even warmer and even fuzzier inside every time he got to cuddle, hug, or otherwise have platonic intimate contact with any of them because he loved all of them so much and knew any other straight guys would most likely try to keep their dicks as far from 5sos’s homoerotic nude dog piles as possible. Homoerotic. That word got thrown around a lot between them and it was always in good fun, but sometimes there _was_ undeniable tension. Someone might need to sneak a wank in on the bus ride between cities and everyone else would have to listen. Maybe waking up from a group cuddle puddle and any percentage of them would have morning wood. It wasn’t gay until someone made it gay- which happened quite often- and the someone was always Michael.

But Calum was never uncomfortable walking around naked and letting Michael slap his ass or wolf-wistle as he walked by. Ashton was never uncomfortable when Michael asked teasing questions about his date with his hand the night before- he’d give Michael the details he asked for and then would continue eating his breakfast. And Luke was never ever uncomfortable whenever Michael got handsy with him. Luke and Michael shared beds the most out of any of them, Luke and Michael could only sit next to each other if their thighs were pressed tightly together, Luke and Michael just seemed to touch each other in ways they didn’t touch anyone else and the other half of the band were genuinely fascinated by it. It didn’t escalate any further, though, until the first time they showered together. 

“No, I smell worse than you, I wanna go first,” Luke argued when Michael announced he needed a rinse off after the show before bus call. Usually, there are communal showers and they can all shower at the same time need be, but this particular venue had a smaller lockerroom with only one shower. Ashton sighed because he was expecting a small fight to come out of this, verbal or physical or both. His exhale stopped short in his throat when Michael just shrugged and-

“Let’s just go together.” 

Both Calum and Ashton were looking between the other two because they weren’t exactly sure if Michael was for real. When Luke just accepted casually, however, the rhthym section of the band decided to treat it like not a big deal, too. And that was that.

\---

Michael turned on the water in the shower and then without warning pushed an already naked Luke underneath it. 

“Fuck, Mike, it’s _cold_ ,” he whined, but gratefully felt the water heat up to a comfortable temperature. He started to rinse off, wiping dried sweat and grime from his shoulders with a washcloth, when he realized he was still alone in the small stall. Glancing up, he could see Michael staring at him. “What?”

Blink. Blink. “Mm? Oh, nothing” Michael said quietly and stepped in next to Luke, a hand going to the other’s hip immediately. Luke didn’t even bother to tell the other to give him space because he never minded Michael touching him. Luke was pretty sure he had some kind of kinesthetic fixation because he couldn’t get enough of human hands on him, honestly, especially Michael’s. Michael retracted his hand on his own, though, needing to run all ten fingers through his hair to get the kinks out of it that formed from the hold of hairspray. They didn’t converse because exhaustion was finally creeping up on both of them, and when Luke needed help getting his back, he didn’t have to say anything before Michael took the washcloth. 

“This is definitely the start of a gay porno,” cracked Mikey to break the silence and it got a single loud ‘ha’ from his friend who’s now facing the wall and letting Mikey swipe the cloth across his broad back. “I’d watch that, though, honestly. We’re fucking hot.” One hand gave Luke a teasing pat on the ass, but then just rested there, palm flat against the skin. “Can’t help but touch you when you let me, I don’t even know why.” His voice is quieter now, but still loud enough for Luke to hear him.

“‘S’okay, I like it when you touch me. ‘S just nice to be able to feel that you’re here with me. Even though I know. I like to feel it.”

“Can I..?” Michael’s question trailed off, but didn’t end because he used his hands to finish it. The wash cloth landed on the floor with a wet ‘thwack’ as it’s discarded so Michael can reach around Luke and hug him from behind. He ran his hands over Luke’s torso and soaked in exactly how his chest and muscles feel because he doesn’t know if he’ll ever get a chance to feel Luke like this again. 

Luke was surprised he was so okay with this all of a sudden. It could have had something to do with the interesting bit of desire he could feel building up inside him. But maybe the shower steam was clouding his mind like it was the glass door. And he knows he’s tired and trusts Michael, and that’s all just on top of the fact that he’s pretty horny. So he just decided to say, “Yeah.”

He knew Michael was handsy, but didn’t know all it took was a simple shower could bring it to this point. But since he was letting himself slowly, _barely_ chub up, he philosophized that getting off was getting off no matter the hand that did it. Cause if letting a boy touch him the way Michael was was gay- fingers teasing his nipples, tracing his collar bones, trailing all the way down, down, down- then didn’t that mean jerking off essentially was just as gay? And who even cared? Luke didn’t, at least not right now. Right now, a little gay was _a lot_ okay.

Michael was loving the view in front of him. He was standing on his toes, chin resting on Luke’s shoulder and head looking down to actually see the body he was feeling up. He hadn’t meant to let himself get this far, but after shows he was especially cuddly and Luke’s skin had been cooler than his and he had been encouraged to touch rather than denied. And he couldn’t possibly refuse the broad, sexy boy even though they were friends. Honestly, the whole band was as close as they possibly could be platonically- and definitely a little bit romantically as well- so it was about time they leveled up to somewhat sexual. Because that was just how these things went, right? 

Both of them thought so, because both of them sighed when Michael finally dragged his fingertips up the length of Luke’s semi. Michael couldn’t tear his eyes away as he wrapped his hand around Luke and gave an experimental tug that had Luke bracing himself against the wall with one arm. “Is this okay?”

Michael couldn’t even finish the short question before Luke’s head was nodding up and down fervently. “Yes, yeah, yes, _Michael_.” The other’s name slipped out of his lips as a moan when the hand on his dick decided not to waste any time and go straight to pumping him with quick strokes and twists of the wrist. Luke forgoed words for pants because he was now so hard and Michael was so good.

Behind Luke, Michael started to touch himself and Luke could feel from the way Michael’s fist brushed against his back that Michael was using the same pace on himself as he was on him. Michael wished he could see Luke’s face when he came, but that felt like it would push this from weird to just wrong. For what couldn’t have even been two minutes, they stayed just like they like were, half under the jet of water until Michael stole Luke’s orgasm from him; It surprised them both because Luke hadn’t even known it was happening until the nanosecond before he came. Michael moved back enough that he wasn’t pressed against Luke and used both hands now to get himself to where Luke had just been. Luke still had both hands holding himself up against the shower wall and when he stood up straight he realized he was no longer being touched anywhere at all. Needing, still, some kind of physical contact with another body, he reached one arm behind him to gently grab onto Michael’s thigh. As soon as he did, Michael moaned loudly as he came on his stomach and hand. Under the water stream, the evidence that anything had happened at all was conveniently washed away as it swirled down the drain. 

Assuming that both boys having their orgasm signaled the end of their shower, Luke turned the water off, but couldn’t grab a towel until Michael moved out of his way of the shower door. But Michael didn’t. He just smiled cheekily and said, “Thanks for the shower.” But his smug tone didn’t fool Luke who could see the anxiety in his eyes. He must have had the same look in his baby blues because he definitely felt the nerves and confusion pumping through his veins as his blood dispersed back to the rest of body and left his dick soft between his legs.

Taking ques from Michael, he smiled and swallowed down the awkwardness. Best friends can’t be awkward, it was just a rule or something. “No problem. Thank _you_ , Champ.” _Champ_ Where the fuck had that come from? Michael just laughed, though, so Luke pretended like ‘champ’ was definitely something he called people all the time and walked past Michael, giving him a pat on the shoulder as he did. So they had acknowledged what had just happened, and now they could move past it. Yet, they both toweled dry in silence and didn’t say a word to each other until they were saying their good nights to the whole band. There was a _look_ shared between them before they closed the curtains of their bunks, a look that roughly translated to ‘I know you’ll be dreaming about me tonight.’

\---

Michael was acting very unperturbed by what had happened in the shower a few days ago, but Luke thought about it every morning, day and night. He thought about it whenever he saw Michael which was basically always. Still, he was pretty sure he was doing a good job of acting like he _wasn’t_ thinking of Michael’s hands on his dick every time he watched the other play guitar or open a beer or text or do anything with them. But he wasn’t being as obvious as he hoped because at lunch before their next show, Michael texted Luke under the table. At first Luke had rolled his eyes at Michael’s childish attempt to get his attention, but when he saw the message on the screen he choked on his water. Calum slapped his back until he stopped and then did one more ‘to be safe’ that was just meant to hurt. Glancing back at his phone- this time in his lap because he knew now that the text was NSFL, not safe for lunch. 

_the hotel showers tonight are supposed to be huge. big enough for 2 ;) i can tell you’ve been thinking bout it_

He never replied, not to leave Michael hanging but because he didn’t know _how_ to reply. For one, Michael gave great handjobs and both of them- all four members of the band, really- were probably planning on getting laid or masturbating tonight anyway. But then again, he was still really unsure about this whole situation and not even because he’s just realized he probably likes guys and if he likes guys he might like other genders he didn’t know he liked. He’s just realized he probably likes Michael. He doesn’t fancy him, but the friendship feelings he has for Michael are strong as hell and as aforementioned, Michael gave great handjobs. 

“Luke!” Calum squished both of Luke’s cheeks together then moved them so it made Luke’s puckered mouth move. “‘Hi, I’m Luke, and I pay attention to what my friends say.’” He let go and sat back down on the couch across from Luke’s. 

“Fuck off,” Luke muttered and that had him furrowing his eyebrows because Luke who could laugh for days about something dumb like that was telling him instead to fuck off. 

“You fuck off. If you’d heard what I said you’d’ve heard me say something _nice_ , but you didn’t so I take it back.” 

A sigh. “Sorry. ‘M just out of it today.”

“I noticed. I was trying to ask you if you were okay? And I was gonna let you know you can always talk to me about shit if you need to. And then I was gonna get up and hug you and let you choose to be left alone in your thoughts or talk to me about what’s on your mind.” Luke did smile now and Calum smiled back, dropping the tone of indignation and continuing. “Anyway. Are you okay?”

Luke shook his head no. He wasn’t very good at hiding how he felt or about keeping his problems to himself. He preferred support and advice and hugs. But this time, it wasn’t just his own thing, it was Michael’s thing, too. He knew Michael and Calum were just as close, if not closer, as all of the other guys, but it still felt like kissing and telling and that was something he didn’t like to do. Calum moved over to the other sofa and sat with Luke. He had noticed Luke’s strange demeanor the last few days- nothing ever slipped by Calum, he was observant as hell and could read each of his friends like a book- and it had gotten worse today after lunch and he was sick of seeing the younger boy like this. Calum used to be the one Luke always came to when something upset him, whether he got a bad grade on a quiz and needed to rant about their teacher or he was having dark thoughts he just couldn’t push out of his head by himself. So for Luke to still stay quiet even when he was sitting right here next to him rubbing up and down Luke’s back, Calum was confused.

“You don’t have to tell me. Is there anything I can do?” 

“No, no, I wanna tell you. I dunno how.” Luke licked his lips and tried not to think too hard about the soothing hand on his back because the last time one of his friends touched him like that, it ended in orgasms. Calum waited, knew that Luke was bad at articulating his thoughts in a way that made sense out loud like it did in his head. Finally, Luke took a deep breath and started off with: “So you know Michael?”

“Yes, I know Michael,” Calum would have laughed if he didn’t know that would hurt Luke even more than he must have already been.

“Okay,” Luke wiped his palms on his jeans even though they weren’t that sweaty, “You know how Michael’s bi? ...Or something that’s not straight?” Calum had an idea where this was going, but it made him even more confused. Luke more than anyone else would know how receptive the whole band would be if he discovered something about his sexuality. It didn’t seem like something Luke would hide from him. “Well, I kinda let him give me a handjob.”

And there. It was out. Luke didn’t have to carry the burden of a dirty secret, he didn’t have to self-sabotage his friendship with Michael just because of his own anxiety. And, wow, yeah, that was _not_ what Calum was expecting at all because until today he hadn’t even known Luke might like another gender and he hadn’t thought Michael was serious all those times he joked about how much he’d bang every member of the band. Michael had certainly been serious at least about Luke, but not enough to take care of him afterwards apparently. Luke was kind of a mess. 

“Okay, um… well how? Not like how he… but like how did you guys end up in that… position?” Calum was still trying to wrap his head around this, because he could already feel himself getting mad at Michael and he didn’t know anything about the situation. 

“When we were in the shower-” oh, of course, that one should have been obvious to Calum, “-he just started touching me, like just normally. Well, normal for us you know?” Yeah, Calum knew. “And then, like, it just happened and then. That was it.” That couldn’t have been it. “He hasn’t really talked to me about it at all since then, I think it was just like… as normal as cuddling for him.” So that was really it?

“And it wasn’t for you?” Calum asked.

“Um, no. Not because, like, I wanted it to mean something. Because- god- I love Mikey, but the same way I love you and Ash. So it’s not that, I don’t think. And it’s not that it was a guy either, like, yeah that took a bit for me to be okay with, but I am, I think I realized I don’t really care about what gender someone is, like, I dunno if they have a name for that-”

“Pansexual, I’m pretty sure.”

“Okay, then I’m that, I guess. But like. What bothers me is that it was Michael and it felt really fucking good. Like I… I would do it again.”

Calum lifted one leg onto the couch so that he could sit facing Luke. And he thought having some time alone with Luke would be good for his friend to sort his thoughts out, but thank god no one was supposed to be back in the green room for another few minutes. This was getting into some dangerous, but interesting territory. 

“That good, huh?” He already assumed Michael knew his way around a cock based on how often Michael liked to describe his own. “Like, is that why you’ve been so jumpy around him? You think he’s hot and you want him to touch your cock more but you don’t want it to be weird?”

“Well, I… I would have worded it differently, but yes.” Luke wasn’t as embarrassed as he thought he would be when he finally started admitting these things. That was why he loved Calum, Calum could always steer a conversation in the direction it needed to go, whether he knew it or not. Calum would never judge him no matter how many layers he peeled back off Luke. Luke was surprised he still had layers to be peeled, Calum and the other boys knew him to his core. But it probably didn’t count if it was a layer you didn’t know you even had.

“Well, fuck, now I’m curious. If it’s _that_ good right?” Calum was smirking so Luke thought it was a joke, but then Cal’s licking his lips and his eyes got darker and Luke realized he was serious. “All I have to do is get him in a shower right?” Luke just sat there as he struggled once again to find words he could say and not just process in his brain. 

He was saved from having to articulate anything else, however, when their other half came in the room and plopped themselves down on the couch Calum had started out on. A few other people trickled into the room as well and Luke sighed. He didn’t really care that they were interrupted. He was just afraid now that Calum would try to steal his shower time with Michael.

\---

With Luke back on his game after his talk with Calum, the band dynamic returned to normal and they played a better show than they had been after the initial incident with Luke and Michael. Plus, they were all pretty excited for a night in a hotel since they had to be on a plane tomorrow morning. It was a good kind of night, the kind of night that made you feel invincible and made people do stupid things without any stupefying substances. So basically, what they had was a recipe for potential disaster.

In the elevator on the way up to their rooms, Luke and Calum were giving each other challenging looks the entire time. Their intentions were clear to each other, but not to Michael or Ashton who casually chatted all the way up and out of the lift. In the hallway, the tension between Luke and Calum escalated. They all headed in the same directions and Luke hung pretty close to Michael’s side- Michael, who didn’t seem to notice that his two friends were both trying to get into his hotel room and subsequently his shower. Mike made a small noise to indicate he’d found the door with his room number on it so Luke knew it was his time to swoop in and accept the offer he was texted earlier.

“Hey Mikey, can I hang in yours tonight? Haven’t seen you all day.”

Luke wanted to scream because how dare Calum, how _dare_ he. Michael looked at Calum while he waved his room key over the sensor lock and opened up his door. “Yeah, ‘m not tired and ‘s’not like I had any plans,” Michael takes Calum up on that and the smug bastard had the audacity to wink at Luke as he passed. Michael also gave Luke an apologetic shrug, but it really wasn’t his fault that Luke never texted him back and Calum wanted some alone time with him. When the door shut behind the two, Luke continued down the hall. Ashton was already gone, he had looked like he needed a good night’s sleep and Luke knew that that was what he’d be getting as well. He didn’t want a good night’s sleep, though. He wanted a handjob in Michael’s shower. 

\---

“Everything okay, Cal?” Michael asked as he kicked his shoes and socks off into a corner with his luggage. 

“Yeah, just feel like you and me haven’t gotten any time, just the two of us, in a while.” While Michael was only bare on his feet, Calum had already escaped his shirt and was halfway to pulling his pants down. “You wanna shower first or me?”

“You just complained about spending more time together and now you wanna take a shower?” Michael snorted, but Calum was fighting back an excited smile at how perfect this was going. He was so wound up lately, having no time for himself for what had to have been over two weeks. And that was a long time for him to go with not getting off so when Luke was just dangling an amazing handjob in his face, Calum was pretty desperate to see for himself if Michael was as good as he said.

“Dude, we’re fucking gross, we really should before getting on the plane tomorrow. Why don’t we just go together? You and Luke did, so it’s a thing now, right?” Calum was the best bluffer in the band which helped here because if he laid all his cards on the table right away, Michael might fold. There was the chance still, that they’d get in the shower and Michael wouldn’t be as touchy-feely as he had been the other night. 

\---

Michael was _just_ as touchy-feely as he had been the other night. It started with Calum asking Michael to help him shampoo his hair- even though he was obviously capable of doing it himself. And Cal’s natural curls were a weakness of Michael’s. He seemed to always have his hands in Calum’s hair if he could and it was always followed up by Michael wanting to cuddle up as close as possible to Calum. After Calum had rinsed his hair, he just stayed under the spray of the shower with his eyes closed. Michael’s first touch came then, and Calum barely twitched even though he couldn’t see. He opened his eyes and found himself face to face with Michael who was holding onto his sides. Michael’s hands slid behind to Calum’s back and Calum wrapped his own arms around Michael so they were hugging in. “You’re cuddly, tonight, huh?” Calum teased. 

A muffled ‘mhmm’ was hummed in reply against Calum’s neck where Michael buried his face. Calum lifted a hand into Michael’s hair this time and said, “Good. I like when you invade my personal space.” 

“Oh, do you?” Michael lifted his head and pushed the tip of nose against Calum’s. He giggled and Calum thought that was pretty cute and he understood now what Luke had been talking about when he said he found Michael very attractive. Calum knew Michael was attractive, they all were, but he could feel himself being attracted _to_ Michael which was a new realm altogether.

Calum noticed they’d been rubbing their noses for a few long moments. “Mikey, I’m gonna kiss you now, okay?” And if Michael thought this was weird, or he felt guilty about showering with two members of his band in one week, he didn’t show it. He just happily closed the distance between them, catching Calum off guard. But Calum wasn’t complaining. Luke hadn’t said anything about Michael being a good kisser, and Calum was proud that he- so far- had Michael’s soft pink lips all to himself. It felt like this was something they’d done before, several times but they never had. Michael’s hands wandered down to Calum’s ass where they squeezed and tugged him forward. With their legs slotted together, they could each feel the other’s hard on against their hips. 

“Fuck, Cal, lemme get you off. Can I?” Michael liked this, liked that showering with his best friends had become a thing. Liked that they let him touch them as if it was something both of them needed. Maybe next time he could share a shower with Ash.

“Yeah, ‘course you can,” Calum answered as if it was obvious. Michael was kissing him again so he couldn’t see as one of Michael’s hands came between them and grabbed a hold of both of their cocks. Strangely enough, the feel of a dick against his own wasn’t awful, but Calum chocked it up to it being _Michael’s_ dick. The connection between them made it not weird to have _this_ kind of connection.

It, honestly, was pretty impressive of Michael to get his hand around both of them because neither of them were particular gargantuan but Michael’s fingers were notoriously short. Even so, Calum gently moved his hips back and forth, fucking into the tight space between Michael’s hand and cock. He was pretty sure this wasn’t what Luke had been talking about earlier, but this could quite possibly be better than a simple handie. Calum whispered words of encouragement into Michael’s ear. “So good, fuck, feels amazing, god your hands… Fuck. Fuck. _Fuck_! He came way sooner than he would have liked. But it was okay because he got to step back and watch Michael jerk himself off until he fell over the edge. Which might have been the most beautiful look on Michael he’d ever seen and he definitely wouldn’t be opposed to seeing it again. 

They both caught their breath, just smiling goofily at each other like they’d just successfully finished writing a song together or beating a video game together. “I didn’t finish washing up,” Calum finally pointed out followed by him grabbing one of the hotel washcloths and bars of soap. Michael chuckles and takes his turn washing his hair and unlike Luke, Calum had no problem carrying a conversation while they showered. They talked about their shows and about new music they’ve heard and about everything they usually talked about while alone. And if they woke up curled up in the same bed together, well that wasn’t anything out of the ordinary either.

\---

“I hate you,” Luke immediately said when Calum joined him in the car. Calum grinned. “I hate you so fucking much, you fucking… handjob thief.”

“Just beat me to it next time. Ha. Beat me.” Calum laughed at his pun and went on to brag, “You were right by the way, though. He’s good.” 

“Who’s good?” For a split second they thought it was Michael who clambered into the row of seats in front of them, but looked forward and saw Ashton. “Good at what? What’re we talking about?”

“No one,” Luke said at the exact same time Calum said-

“Michael.”

Luke slid down in his seat and he broke Ashton’s gaze nervously. This wasn’t something they could all just talk about was it? Especially while Michael wasn’t even here. Calum didn’t seem to think it was a problem because he just added on, “Gets handsy in the shower. Really handsy.”

Ashton could easily piece everything together from that, and his eyes bugged out of his head. How had Michael given two handjobs right under his nose to the two guys they practically lived with? “I didn’t even know you guys weren’t straight!” Because yeah Calum dropped that bomb like it was nothing and it was kind of a lot to take in. It was still way too early in the morning for this anyway.

“Neither did I,” Luke huffed then sat up straight again, more confident this time. “Decided I’m not, though.”

Ashton glanced at Calum expectantly who just shrugged and said, “Pretty I sure I still am. ‘Cept for Mikey.”

Three heads turned to the car door as Michael was practically shoved into the car, arms full of muffins and one stuck in his mouth like an apple in a pig. “Free breakfast is not an excuse to be late,” he was scolded by Jesse, their head of personal security, “You can buy breakfast at the airport. Have someone pick it up for you on the way. I dunno, just don’t be a dumb ass.”

The door was slammed and everyone, but Michael started buckling up. He spit out the muffin in his mouth and complained while chewing. “But I was hungry now…” He doesn’t seem too phased, though, about getting in trouble and just finishes off the chocolatey muffin with a big bite out of it. “Oh, right, guys. Muffins, anyone?” 

No takers.

“Uh, Michael,” Ashton started, needing to confront _someone_ which was always his best strategy to tackling big issues. But immediately, he got a painful thump on the head from Luke and he changed what he was about to say on the spot, “I actually do want one. Blueberry?”

\---

At least, Ashton now understood why Luke jumped up off the couch when Michael said he was going to have a shower. “Can I come?” And Ashton wondered if Luke heard his own double entendre because Michael definitely heard it. 

Michael was nodding and smirking, “Yeah you can.” And they disappeared off to the communal showers, empty of crew or other team members since the stage still needed to be struck down and busses loaded. Calum and Ashton looked at each other, Ashton in discomfort and Calum in disappointment.

“I wanted to shower with Michael tonight,” Calum grumbled because and even though there was more than one shower, Luke probably didn’t want to share. “Gonna have to rinse off by myself and have to get off on the bus alone.”

“I don’t understand what the big deal is, just get off by yourself or, like, don’t at all,” Ashton was untying his shoes and then kicking them off. He had wiped the sweat off his face and body, but his shirt and socks were still damp and he was really pissed that Luke’s horniness was keeping him from getting to shower right now. 

“You really don’t understand. His hand is just better than my own and best so far I’ve had, honestly. And it’s convenient and he likes it, gets himself off too.” 

Ashton had to interrupt, “You’re kind of using him, you know? Like getting in the shower with him just so he’ll toss you off. Like that’s not really cool, you can’t just objectify your friend the way you guys are doing.”

Calum scoffed because there was a truth to Ashton’s words, but his opinion strongly differed. He was offended by the way Ashton was talking down to him. “It’s not objectifying. We fucking love Michael, you can’t say we don’t. And we found out conveniently we’re sexually attracted to him, too, so why not recieve a mind-blowing consensual wristie for it?”

“But it’s conditional? Only in the shower?”

“So far. I mean, he just really wants to touch you all over cause it’s so warm and close in there and then there’s a hand on your dick. I didn’t believe Luke when he told me, but I swear by Michael’s hand okay?”

Ashton gave a huge sigh and got up off the couch to at least take his smelly clothes off while they waited for the other two to come back. He didn’t get it, he really didn’t. And Calum said he was still straight, but he’s obviously damn attracted to Michael. Ashton could get where that was coming from, he understood they were a very good-looking band. But he wasn’t desperate enough to race his friend to a shower just to get off with your mutual friend. It just didn’t make sense.

\---

It made sense. Ashton took back everything negative he said to Luke and Calum because he was standing in a hotel shower with Michael and letting Michael drag his hands up his thighs and talk about how much he’s always loved them. Ashton feels like a weak-willed person, for this one lapse of judgement. But thanks to that lapse, he had the chance to pull Michael roughly up by his hair and kiss him hungrily. Unlike Luke and Calum, Michael had actually kissed Ashton before this on several occasions actually. Ashton being, at the time, the only other queer member of the band meant that he was Michael’s go to for drunken kisses. Because Michael was a horny drunk, but was still only ever interested in his closest friends over strangers. And, well, Ashton wished that those times could have ended with Michael touching him in the shower like this.

He also was hoping that Michael could start touching them all out of the shower, too, because there were a lot of things he wanted to do to him. He only had been legitimately thinking about it since Calum told him what was going with himself, Luke, and Michael. He’d denied Michael more times than he could count since meeting him and now he wanted him so badly and just couldn’t get enough. They moved their lips together and Michael let Ash pull his bottom lip between his teeth. Michael had probably wanted Ash the most out of his whole band, but he would never admit it because he did love all of them equally. But for the longest time, Ashton was the only member he thought would ever let him into a sexual situation, and now he ended up being the last out of them. 

He didn’t know how far any of his friends would go with him, though, so Michael kept his hands to himself whenever he could with the exception of the showers. It was okay, though, he’d take what he could get. And fuck, was Ashton giving a lot to him right now. Michael’s hands were wandering all over Ashton’s body, practically worshipping it. He broke the kiss to drag his tongue over Ash’s jaw line which dripped with water from above them. Michael wanted to show him what he had been missing. He lowered his mouth to Ashton’s shoulder and then over to his collarbone where he knew a hickey wouldn’t be visible under a t shirt. Michael let his hands wander to Ashton’s nipples and the other gasped because that felt fucking good. He didn’t know how Michael knew exactly what to do to pull him apart like this, but he wouldn’t dare stop the fingers pinching his hard nipples or the teeth biting more marks onto the soft skin of his chest. 

Then finally what had enticed Ashton into the shower with Michael in the first place- forgoing movie night with the others when Michael said he wanted to shower and stay in and Calum suggested Ash keep him company. He knew Calum was doing him a favor, keeping himself and the lustful Luke out of Michael’s shower so he could finally have a night to go for it. Fuck it, he had decided, needing to know if Michael was as good as he said. Fuck _me_ , Michael thought when he got his hand on Ashton’s cock. And just the first touch sent sparks shooting up Ashton’s body. He exhaled loudly which made Michael smile and ask him, “Good?”

“So good.” But it didn’t need to be said because Michael knew. Michael knew that’s what kept Calum and Luke coming into every shower he took. He hadn’t taken a shower alone since he first jerked off Calum. That was fine with him, he liked to make his best friends feel good and he was glad that Ashton finally came around. But the other boy was still holding back, Michael could sense it. He could tell Ashton was thinking too much especially because Ashton was known for overthinking things. 

“You’ll never guess what song I have stuck in my head,” Michael said casually in an attempt to make Ashton more comfortable. Small talk was a strange tactic considering he was pumping Ashton’s length slowly between them, but it was the first thing Michael thought of.

“Probably not,” Ashton managed with a shaky voice, “Not of ours, is it?”

“Nope. I don’t know what it’s called but that one that’s like ‘a hey ha ehe debebebe’ and was like kind of a meme before memes?”

Ashton laughed, a genuine laugh that fills Michael up with sunshine. It’s breathier than normal, because Ashton is panting slightly now as Michael speeds his hand up. Michael’s idea was working because Ashton was clearly no longer thinking of this as sex with his best friend but more as spending time with his best friend that happened to involve sex. “The Ketchup Song? I guess that was kind of pre-meme, huh?”

“Yeah,” Michael smiled and finally gave himself some much need relief with his other hand, “I wonder what the first meme is.”

“Like you mean troll face and forever alone face?”

“No, like before that. Dinosaur memes, that people don’t think of as being part of meme history.” 

Ashton couldn’t believe he was getting close to coming and they were having a conversation about fucking memes. He couldn’t carry on talking because his range of focus was shrinking just to ‘orgasm, orgasm, orgasm’ and Michael understood.

“You close?” A nod. “Alright. Don’t worry about it. ‘S’okay. We’re okay. You can let go.”

As if to punctuate Michael’s sentence, Ashton came and his knees nearly buckled with it. It felt so out of place, so surprising and sudden- but he had felt it build and couldn’t deny that Michael could get him to come quickly even while talking about memes. So he was with Luke and Calum now, Michael’s shower HJs were as if God, himself, was jacking you off. It could have been a post-orgasmic exaggeration, but Michael did have a ton of skill in something besides music. Ashton ordinarily would offer to return the favor, but Michael looked so blissed out that he realized his hand couldn’t be nearly as pleasurable as Michael’s, even on himself. 

Michael could tell he wasn’t too far behind Ashton and to help himself along, he used his newly freed hand to tease his own nipple. When Ashton reached forward to pinch the one Michael neglected, Michael groaned loudly and stilled his hand on himself as he ejaculated onto the shower floor. He leant against the shower wall and looked up at Ash, who definitely looked like he wanted to say something. With crossed arms and an arched eyebrow, Michael silently urged the other to speak up. He didn’t. 

Ashton and Michael just finished their shower by singing the meme song until they were both dried off and exiting the bathroom. 

“You gonna stay in here tonight?” Michael asked, somewhat hopefully. 

“I… Yeah.” He nodded his head. Even though Ashton was the least likely of the four of them to share a room or bed with someone else, he would feel awful if he just let Michael get him off and then he left with barely a ‘thanks’. 

Laying on their backs, side by side in the king-sized bed, neither boy could find themselves tired enough to sleep. But they were too sleepy to really do much else than just lie there and stare at the ceiling. Ashton was first to break the silence, “So can I ask, like… why?”

“Why what?” Michael turned his head to the side and the look on his face showed that he definitely knew what Ashton meant by ‘why’. But the other boy wasn’t looking at him. Just finding shapes and pictures in the rough surface of the ceiling above them. 

“Why do you always give ‘em what they want? Luke and Cal? Like, you know when they get in there with you what they want-”

“What you wanted too,” Michael interrupted.

“Yeah. Just, like. I wanna understand it better. Beyond you give addicting handjobs in the shower.”

“I think that’s all there is to it. I mean, I like it when they let me. And they only ever let me in the shower. And then it just turned into a thing with all of you. I like it too much to stop it, but…” 

When Michael trailed off, Ashton rolled onto his side to furrow his eyebrows at him. He urged, “But…?”

“But I kinda feel bad for wanting more when I know you guys just want to get off.” Michael had been feeling sick to his stomach, holding that in and now that he had told someone, he felt even worse. He just rolled over and muttered, “Forget about it. I’m tired, let’s sleep.”

Ashton was confrontational and Michael was defensive so usually a conversation like this wouldn’t end with one of them deciding to just roll over and quit. “No,” Ashton whispered, trying to sound as gentle as possible to not upset the other any further, “Like, that’s not your fault that you feel like that. Cause they- we used you… and we could have cared more.”

“Cared more?” Michael chuckles, still facing the wall, “Isn’t that a little gay, Ash?”

“So what? Luke’s into dudes now, I’ve always been, Calum’s into you. It is a little gay, it’s really gay. And you’re usually so proud about that.”

“Yeah, I know, I know what I say and how I act, but I’m not bi or whatever people think I am. I just… I didn’t want to admit… It’s too hard to admit...” He rolled over and fiddled with the corner of his pillowcase. “I’m pretty sure I’m demi, too. Demisexual and romantic I think. All of it. Ashton, please don’t tell the others, but Luke… the first time in the shower with Luke was my first time with anyone. I only started realizing I liked guys, like, right after you joined the band _because_ of the band. It wasn’t that I liked guys… it was that I liked you guys.”

How something so deep and important had never been shared by Michael before, flabbergasted Ashton. Not to mention, he’d thought Michael was way more sexually experienced based on how he acted, talked, and gave handies. “You know we would never ever judge you. You don’t have to hide from us- lie to us.” He felt odd speaking on behalf of the whole band, but if this was something Michael was only comfortable discussing with him, he would never force Michael to talk about it with other people, too. “We love you.”

“Yeah, I know but I’m _in_ love with you.” Michael buried his face in his pillow and groaned loudly because this was so damn frustrating. He tried to separate his feelings from sex, but it was impossible especially because he’d only ever had sex- kinda- with people he had feelings for. He felt like he was split into different people; public Michael who was sexual and loud and funny and gave no fucks, private Michael who was thoughtful and cuddly and vulnerable, intimate Michael who was so in love with his band mates he could never ever admit to anyone except himself. And now Ashton, too. Ashton, who was just gazing at Michael with a small frown. He didn’t seem freaked out to Michael, he looked pitying which was almost worse. 

“You don’t deserve to be treated like a sex toy,” Ashton finally said and it wasn’t what Michael was expecting but instead of cutting him off, he let him continue. “They have no idea- hell, Luke came to Cal the day after the first time and he was so upset because you were acting like you just didn’t care about what happened at all. And he did.”

“He did?” He tried not to sound hopeful.

And even though that wasn’t exactly what Luke had said, Ashton decided to tell Michael just what he needed to hear. “Yeah, he did. And me too. I honestly couldn’t- I hated feeling like I was just… using you and I wanted to give you so much more because you deserve so much more.”

And when they connected their lips together in a soft kiss, if Michael was crying he never would admit it. And Ashton wouldn’t point it out.

\---

The next morning, Ash and Michael didn’t need to talk about anything because they had discussed everything last night. In fact, they didn’t even feel much like talking to each other at all because of how tired they were from staying up into the early hours of the morning together. They both would just sneak naps in wherever they could. 

Rejoining the rest of their band, Ashton had a protective arm wrapped around Michael’s waist who looked like he could collapse any second. His head was resting on Ashton’s shoulders and he had his eyes closed whenever they weren’t walking forward. Luke immediately became worried. “Is he okay. Are you okay, Michael?”

“‘M okay, just tired.”

“Wonder what you two could’ve done to tire yourselves out like that,” Calum joked, but he fell silent mid-laugh at Ashton’s meaningful look. “Okay, geez, sorry, I thought since we all had Mikey’s hands on our dicks we were at least allowed to talk about it now.”

“Sorry I’m such a slut, Cal.” Michael stood up straight on his own so he could yawn and stretch his arms over his head. “Still don’t think I’m as big a slut as you, though.”

“No one is.” A wink from Calum and a small smile from Michael. 

Ashton and Michael were the first to get into the car that’d take them to the airport. Before anyone could join them, Ashton stole a kiss and whispered, “Are you okay?” A nod in response. “Are you gonna tell them like you said you would?” A shrug. “You know you don’t have to if you don’t want to. You can wait.” A sigh.

“I know. But I need to or it’s just gonna get worse. Fuck, I hate feeling.”

“Feeling what?”

“Just feeling. Feeling. Feels.” 

\---

“Luke can I talk to you?” Michael whispered when he was positive Ashton was asleep and Calum’s eyes were on his movie with his noise-cancelling headphones keeping him from overhearing anything. Luke was just in the process of throwing a blanket over himself to try and catch some Zs as well, but Michael was always way more important.

“‘Course. Always. You okay?” Reaching between them, Luke raised the armrest back so they could cuddle up close next to each other and share the fuzzy blanket. 

“I think so. I just… I’ve been thinking about how like… how whenever I go to take a shower you always wanna come with me.”

Luke started panicking because he thought Michael was going to say he wasn’t comfortable with that anymore. He was afraid he’d crossed a line and hurt his best friend. And he really didn’t want to stop taking showers with Michael either. “D’you want me to stop? I didn’t realize that-”

“No, no, no!” Michael interrupted him quickly because he definitely didn’t want Luke to stop letting him touch him. “I just, um, how would you feel about like… something like that but not just in the shower? Like… would you ever let me touch you when we’re, like, I dunno on a plane and no one’s paying attention and we’re under a blanket?”

Oh. Oh. That is not what Luke was expecting and he especially wasn’t expecting Michael’s hand on his thigh. “I, uh, would be okay with that. Yeah.” How could Luke say no? He had the weakest will of anyone when it came to Michael and with his newfound sexual attraction- “Fuck.”

Michael was going right for it because talking serious made him nervous, but getting Luke off was easy. He ground the heel of his palm down against the bulge in Luke’s jeans until he could feel it hardening and starting to strain in its confines. Even with the blanket, it was pretty obvious what was going on. Michael undid Luke’s jeans and made it even easier to slowly jerk the other boy. “That’s not all,” he said quietly and Luke turned to try and interpret the serious look on his face. Michael continued, “I love you. All of you. You and Cal and Ash.”

“I know, Mikey,” Luke murmured, “We love you too.”

“No.” Michael tried not to sound too frustrated with Luke because there was no way he could have known what Michael was going through and feeling. He tried not to talk too much about his emotions if he could help it, so he couldn’t blame Luke for being concerned. He twisted his wrist under the blanket and Luke let out another curse word. Michael leaned over because it was time to /show/ Luke what he meant. Without any warning he pressed his lips to Luke’s and kissed him softly, like he meant it. Because he did. And when he pulled away and whispered, “I love you,” like he meant it. He did. 

And when Luke went back in for a second kiss, Michael sped up his movements until Luke was gasping and bucking up shamelessly into Michael’s hand. The blanket at this point was just a formality and it was a wonder that they hadn’t woken up the napping Ashton yet. Although, they had caught someone’s attention. Calum’s headphones hung around his neck and his laptop was closed. But neither Luke nor Michael had noticed-- they were a little busy pushing their tongues against each other’s and when taking moments to breath, telling the other how much they loved them. Calum watched with wide eyes as Luke came- he could only watch his face, but it was enough- and as Michael cleaned up with the blanket while Luke tucked himself back into his pants. Luke looked back up at Michael with red cheeks, but Michael wasn’t looking back at him. Following his gaze, Luke locked eyes with Calum and blushed even deeper. 

For a minute, the three of them were just staring at each other in silence, but Calum finally cleared his throat and said, “Wow. I didn’t realize you guys felt so, um, strongly for each other. Has this been going on for awhile?”

“Actually, I just found out right now,” Luke sounded as shocked as Calum did. 

“Not just Luke,” Michael tore his eyes away from Calum to look down at his lap. “You, too. And Ashton. All of you.” At this point, there was stirring from the fourth member of their band, and no one said a word- whether to not startle the waking Ashton or because they didn’t know what to say. He sat all the way up, and ran a hand through the hair on top of his head, slightly matted from travel and sleep. 

“Mikey..?” At Ashton’s concerned voice, Michael got out of his seat to cross the small bit of space between their rows and sat himself down in Ashton’s lap. It was a startling sight for Luke and Calum, but it also looked so seamless and normal that it could have been something that happened every day; Michael, sitting forward facing on Ashton’s lap with his arms wrapped around him from behind. “You told them?”

Calum chuckled, which actually diffused some of the tension they all were facing. “I feel like… everything makes fucking sense now. Like, of course this is where we would end up one day.”

“What do you mean?” Luke felt lonely on his side of the seats now even though he was across from his band, sitting across from and watching at them, he wasn’t a part of them. He wanted to be and suddenly he wanted to take his question back because it clicked in his head- or heart- too. “Oh.”

“Yeah,” Calum laughed again and it actually elicited a throaty giggle from Michael of all people. When the most nervous and vulnerable one was able to laugh along, everyone joined in until they were all sounding like a group of kids on a sitcom. 

“I love you guys. For real love,” Michael said. And everyone was able to agree.

“Yeah.” “Me too.” “Always have, I think.”


End file.
